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Wingnut Tea Party Jerk Renee Ellmers Loses Primary, Calls Woman Fat, Like You Do
But…but…I need my paycheck! Aww, it’s time to play the sad-goodbye music for North Carolina wingnut Rep. Renee Ellmers, who won the distinction Tuesday of being the very first GOP incumbent in 2016 to...
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Nancy Pelosi Just Cold Trollin’ Paul Ryan Now, And Also She Hatin’
She borrows back the gavel from time to time to stick it up Ryan’s ass. Oh, Nancy Pelosi, how we miss thee being the boss of us in the House of Representatives. But for now, fresh-faced boy wonder Paul...
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Team Of Evils: Jeff Sessions Was Too Racist To Be A Federal Judge, But He...
Beloved cartoon character Elmer Fudd proclaims it’s Rabid Season In a move that’s likely to drain many Americans’ reserves of profanity, Donald Trump has chosen Alabama Sen. Jeff Sessions to be the...
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Creepy Milo Dude Gets To Write Whole Book About How Much He Loves Black Dicks
Did you hear he fucks black guys? He fucks black guys, and he wants you to know that. Wonkette is waiting with bated breath for Milo Yiannopoulos, that very edgy, non-PC “alt-right” white supremacist...
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Republicans Need A Little More Time To ‘Replace’ Obamacare. Does Never Work...
Won’t it be great to have insurance company death panels back again? President Obama and Vice President-elect Pence held meetings with members of Congress this morning to plan out how their respective...
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Sean Spicer Definitely Not Saying Trump’s Golf Games Are OK Just Because He’s...
‘To find a man’s true character, play golf with him.’ — P.G. Wodehouse OK, you filthy liberals giggling over how Donald Trump has been golfing like crazy since taking office, let’s get this straight:...
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Genius Republican Thinks Waiters Aren’t Worth Wasting Medicine On
Oh, THAT guy Genius congressman Warren Davidson of Ohio, who teabagged himself right into John Boehner’s former congressional seat when Boehner left the House to spend more time with his gin, offered...
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SURRENDER, MANAFORT! Wonkagenda For Mon., Oct. 30, 2017
Morning Wonketariat! San Diego, it’s your night to shine! Visit with Wonkette at Chicano (pot luck!) at Chicano Park, 5 to 8 p.m.! In the meantime, here’s some of the things we may be talking about...
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Paul Ryan Considering Retiring, Just As Soon As He Makes It Impossible For...
And then he’ll grow his beard back Politico has posted a think-piece on Paul Ryan that pontificates vastly on all the ways one can tell that Paul Ryan does not even want to be the Speaker of the House...
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Very Stable Genius Spends Morning Torching His Own FISA Bill On Twitter
President Twittershits is ON FIRE this morning! During Executive Bathrobe Time, which lasts today until 1:30 p.m., he took an important meeting with security expert Judge Andrew Napolitano....
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Midterm Madness: Devin Nunes Is Treading Water In California’s 22nd.
This week we’re headed to California’s 22nd District to pay a visit to the winner of Wonkette’s 2017 Legislative Shitmuffin award, Devin Nunes. One of the most important things to understand about...
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Pot Legalization Bills Big Today For Some Reason. Spring Weather, Probably.
Have you ever REALLY LOOKED at your pointed ears? Fascinating. For some crazy reason, there’s a whole bunch of news about the gentle bud today, man, and the news is good and it is mellow, yea verily....
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It All Started With A Dairy Cow Named ‘Gem’: A Brief History Of Devin Nunes...
This is not Gem. OR IS IT? There is no shortage of articles on Wonkette chronicling the many stupidities of Congressman Devin Nunes, GOP chair of the House “Intelligence” Committee, the man who never...
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We Got Us A TRADE WAR! Wonkagenda For Fri., June 1, 2018
Morning Wonketariat! Here’s some of the things we may be talking about today. Richard Gerson, Jared Kushner’s hedge-fund bestie, is being investigated by Robert Mueller after he turned up at that...
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